In today’s world, I am equipped with the tools (relatively smart, decent work ethic) to be successful. But I’ve always wondered about how the 21st century Sam Stortz of right now would do in other time periods.
Prehistoric (caveman era) – I would have severe problems in this time period. The Sam Stortz of the 21st century has some of the worst eye sight imaginable. I have met only one person that I know of who has worse eyes than me. This would put me at a severe disadvantage when it comes to not only hunting, but also avoiding predators. I could be staring a bear right in face and not realize it. My height relative to people today doesn’t help me out too much and the fact that I’m an extremely slow sprinter would leave me dead. It’s not about being faster than the bear, it’s about being faster than the slowest person running from the bear. Well I could run for 15 miles no problem but when that bear shows up and it runs me down in 100 meters, well my endurance doesn’t help so much. Also, if I keep growing teeth at the ridiculous rate that I have been, well I’d probably die within a few years because they’d get infected or whatever and I’d just be screwed.
Roman Empire – This time period was pretty much based on the expansion and growth of the Roman Empire. If you were a man you should have probably been a warrior, if not that then probably a politician or something. Well since I’m pretty weak and would be of little use to the army I can rule that one out right away. I suppose that since I’m going to be an economics and business major then this wouldn’t be too bad for me.
Middle Ages – If I lived in the middle ages I would have been screwed. I have a bit of a problem when people do things unjustified and with all the shit that went on with religion, well I just would have been dead. I’d have serious problems conforming to some religion that they forced me to and then even more of a problem if they tried to kill me for not doing it. I’d be some torture victim that gets publicly destroyed, split from my gooch to the top of my head. I imagine that I wouldn’t live very long here and even if I did live it’d be a miserable and useless life.
Early Modern Period – This is what I’m learning about in Doughty’s history class right now. I think this would be my best era. It was a time of rebellion to religion and changing governments, individualism/capital was beginning to take over. The great thinkers started using reason and logic to discover things about the world. Physics was just being put into theory. Just think, instead of being a college physics drop out, I’d have a modern day equation named after me or something like the Stortz Theorem. I don’t know what that theorem would be but I’d be a household name just like Newton or Galileo. I wouldn’t be distracted by guitar hero or running, I would just reach my full intellectual potential and be the genius that I was born to be.
Great Depression – I think I’d have a problem here. All the work being done here was industrial stuff, people were so desperate for work they’d be willing to do 15 hours a day for pennies. I wouldn’t do that and since I wouldn’t do that I’d probably be screwed in terms of finding a job. As a last resort I might have to join the army and then go off to WWII. I guess I was pretty good at SOF so maybe I could be a decent solider but as FPS Doug says, “I heard there’s no respawn points in RL, if you get lag out there you’re dead!”.
I guess when you look at the grand scheme. I probably landed myself in the best scenario in the modern world. My physical attributes wouldn’t benefit me anywhere and they’re most fixable in today’s world. I have no problem with authority here like I would in some other time periods but in all honesty I think I’d be more productive if I didn’t have all this shit to do occupy my time and distract me. If I spent all of the time I invested in bejeweled and guitar hero into something productive, I’d have to have accomplished something significant. Anyways, this is just something fun that I thought would be relatively entertaining and a switch from the normal “I went to the library and then played poker”.
I watched most of the all star festivities last night. I’ll go in order as the occurred. The first one was mildly entertaining with the different variety of shots. The WNBA girls were pretty much useless though because anyone can make a 15 footer but the entire competition came down to who could make the half court shot faster. Most of the girls couldn’t even reach the hoop let alone have a somewhat accurate shot.
The skills competition was next and I’m usually a fan of this but this year I didn’t like it that much. I just remember always watching Steve Nash do it and thinking he was the best but I guess not. Anyway, when Chris Paul starts off by instantly missing the lay up, well I was just in shock. I understand there’s a little bit of pressure and he just had a little brain fart but come on, I could have made that lay up (that’s debatable). I wasn’t really rooting for anyone but congrats to Stephen Curry for winning.
The 3 point competition was next and initially I was rooting for Ray Allen. I like him a lot but I realized that I hate Paul Pierce more than I like Ray Allen, so I’d be happier seeing Allen lose just so Paul Pierce would be pissed off instead of seeing Allen win and having Pierce be happy. The thing started and I’d never even heard of the first guy/eventual winner James Jones. After him was Daniel Gibson who was really bad but little did I know one of my favorite players, Kevin Durant, would one up Gibson. Gibson got 7 points in the first round which makes me wonder why they even put him in the contest but then Durant shows up and knocks down 6. I guess the pressure got to them too but that’s no excuse.
Finally, the much anticipated dunk contest. I’ll start by saying that Blake Griffin was going to win this thing no matter what he did. He did not deserve to win in my opinion and I think that he won simply because he’s Blake Griffin. McGee was 10 times more creative which is pretty much what this contest SHOULD come down to. I’m aware that dunking from the foul line is a ridiculous thing to be able to do and that dunk which Ibaka did was better that Griffins second dunk I think, but it’s been done before. The two hoops and dunking three balls that McGee did is what the competition needs. Ibaka’s teddy bear skit, although stupid, was pretty impressive and creative. Griffin’s first dunk, the 360 behind the head thing, was pretty good although I don’t think it deserved a 49, but still it was good. His second dunk was absolutely nothing special and in now way deserved a 46 which put him into the finals. I’d give it a 42 which would have taken him out of the finals but that just wasn’t going to happen. The judges were giving out scores that were way to high for some of the dunks. Finally, the finals. The jumping over the car was so hyped up but just wasn’t that good. Lets be honest, you’d initially think he’s going to jump over the whole car. Not only did he not do that, he jumped over the hood but barely. He also jumped from about half as far away as the foul line which is in no way impressive. The hood of that car is maybe a little over 3 feet off the of the ground, or 40ish inches. To jump up and bend your legs over it and doing it that close to the rim is not impressive. I’m aware I could not even come close to doing that but a large number of the guys in the NBA could. His vertical jump alone is probably around 40 inches so completely bending your legs over that is whatever. Also, what happens there if Griffin doesn’t make the finals. That stupid choir doesn’t get to come out and that car is in the building for absolutely no reason. I personally think the thing could have been rigged so at least he made it to the finals. I’ve heard a lot of critics say this was the best dunk contest ever but I don’t really see what separated it from all the others. Don’t get me wrong it was good but best ever?
I don’t care too much for the All-Star game itself because no one really tries/plays defense. I’m just a little disappointed that more Sixers were not represented this week. Only Jrue Holiday is there. I guess I’m a little bias but whatever. The Sixers are currently 27-29. I predict a 43-39 finish and get the 6 seed in the East, you heard it here first. Back to work everyone.
I’m going to declare myself on a heater because I got my paper draft back. The quote “This paper has the potential to be a very high A paper if you are willing to put in the work” leaves me pretty optimistic.
It’s Saturday night and the entire track team must remain sober because conferences is next week. The weekend was not a total waste though. Last night was a decent one. Mark and I started early with a power hour. We went to dinner beforehand which proved to be too much for me. After about 15-20 minutes of the power hour I pretty much just left Mark to finish it on his own and I quit. My stomach was fighting back and I didn’t want to test the waters because I knew I’d vomit. At the end of the power hour I had finished 4 Beast Ice’s and was not feeling good at all. I was extremely tired and was lacking stomach room to continue drinking. I laid down in various places for an hour or two, socializing and sipping on the occasional beer in the process. Eventually I pepped up a little bit but never got extremely drunk. I went down to 103 for a little bit and played a game of pong with Shiloh. We lost (my fault). Then Abud came upstairs to grab some beer with me and next thing you know we were playing guitar. He’s been playing for a while and is a lot better than I am, it’s always fun to see people who are good. We got caught up with that and were just switching back and forth for a while. Eventually he went back down and I stayed here. Wacker and Mark were jumping out the window and then they went off of an adventure so I went in my room and called it a night.
I woke up with no hangover at about 10:30. Mark and I ran 8 miles and I felt pretty good. I’m really excited, probably too excited, for conferences this week. I need to calm down a bit but I just really want to race. I have a minimal amount of work that I have to do for this week. Little bits here and there but nothing major besides revising my paper.
So now that I’ve blogged and can’t drink, I’ve done all that I wanted to do for Saturday night. It’s 6:30 right now and I’ll probably go to bed in 6 hours. My game plan is to play online poker. I made 26 bucks in an afternoon session today so hopefully I can really get some profit going tonight assuming I don’t play like a tard. I also had a bit of a revelation. I somewhat enjoy reading now. Normally when I read a book I’m constantly checking how far away the next chapter is so I can stop but this book called The Big Short by Michael Lewis is pretty good so far. It was assigned for my business class but I actually like reading it. I don’t know what it is, maybe I’ve made a big leap in character. Chicks dig guys who read.
Have a great Saturday night since I probably won’t.
I’m 99% of the way to officially declaring myself on a heater. There is one piece missing but besides that, everything has been perfect lately. I’m killing it in school, 3 test grades all in the A- to A range, I feel really good running with conferences only a week away, I’m just 2 weeks from 11 days of delight (spring break), and most importantly, the weather is finally turning. I know that it’s supposed to get cold again this week but as long as I get this one frisbee session in, I went outside to play with Abud just now so check that one off, then I have just one more thing to declare this heater, my Doughty paper. He said they ranged from “pretty good to dreadfully bad”. He also said that if you got an email with your grade during the week, then you did terribly and need as much time as possible to improve upon it. I have not received an email fortunately so I assume my paper falls within the B range. If that is the case, I’m on fire.
Last night was a pretty fun one. I got all of my work done early so I could start drinking. My game plan was not to black out or get too drunk. I’d say I got exactly as drunk as I wanted too. Not over the top but definitely buzzed. We started by playing a large variety of drinking games. After the games it was time for Jersey Shore. All in all it was an average episode. I cannot stand Ronnie, to act like such a prick and then become such a cry baby after Sami leaves is ridiculous. The rest of the night was spent drawing on Pane and hanging out with Reagan. I was the perfect level of drunk and went to bed not too late. Drinking makes falling asleep much much easier too. I woke up without a hangover and made it through my day fine.
Tonight is the last day that we can drink until after conferences. That being said I’m not going to go insane. I don’t mind sacrificing one day of drinking out of the entire year for the second most important track meet of the year. I’ll take tonight like any other night and just enjoy myself. I’m not going to do something stupid and get myself hurt, not that I would normally but you get the point. I’m really excited for next weekend. Pane and I spent the 45 minutes of our run today just talking about how much better the team has gotten and how excited we are for everything. It sounds gay but whatever. Enjoy the warm weather while it lasts, I’m sure it won’t be long. Have a nice weekend.
As the title suggests, the has been a change of plans. Conferences is next week and the one week rule is going into effect on Saturday morning. This means that I can’t drink on Saturday. That means that I will most likely be drinking a little bit tonight. That means that I will not be attempting the gallon challenge tonight. Sorry to disappoint those who were very eagerly anticipating it.
On a positive note, we have not only rescheduled the gallon challenge to after conferences, but we’ve also added in a beer mile. My poor attempt last year that resulted in a 9:20ish finish will have to be bettered this year. I’m really hoping to significantly dip into the 7’s. I think it’s extremely doable because not only am I in arguably the best mile shape of my life at the moment, I can also probably drink more now then ever before. I fancy myself a pretty fast/capable chugger and a good enough runner to be in the 7’s without too much difficulty (I say that now). Both of these events will take place the week after conferences (that is after 2/26).
I don’t think of myself as an artist in any way shape or form. I can’t draw or paint or do anything artistic whatsoever and I’m fine with that. However, I think I’m capable of appreciating some art (definitely not all). I was reading in my history book about renaissance art or something and it made me think of the most famous or expensive paintings of all time. Here’s a little review for those of you who don’t know.
The Mona Lisa
I don’t know about everyone else, but this was the very first painting that came to mind when I thought most famous painting or most expensive. Indeed this is regarded as the most famous painting in the world. I can sort of understand why. I did some reading about it and there are so many different ways to view and interpret the painting. The lighting, her posture, her smile, the way her hands are crossed, etc. There was an extremely detailed breakdown of the painting and I couldn’t even really follow. For people to pick up on such subtle meanings really surprises me. I always wonder if the artist even meant to include them. Anyway, there’s no actual for-sale value on this painting but in 1962 they wanted to get a value on it for insurance purposes. They estimated that it was worth roughly 100 million dollars back then, or close to 700 million by today’s standards. That seems like a ridiculous amount but when it’s actually a really good painting and painted by an artist as famous as Da Vinci, I can understand this.
Now, this 2nd graders attempt at drawing his fat sister is somehow considered extremely good and valuable. It’s considered to be abstract art which I don’t fully understand. This thing was painted in 1953 and was sold in 2006 for a ridiculous sum of 137.5 million dollars. Are you fucking kidding me? How!? I understand that there is a woman in the painting but the details when compared to the Mona Lisa make this thing like a piece of shit. The chick is overweight and has a huge schnoz. From my poor artist mind, I see no way that this painting should separate itself from all others as one of the best ever. It’s ridiculous, but the fun isn’t over people.
This masterpiece was painted in 1948 by the genius Jackson Pollock. Correct me if I’m wrong, but this just seems like some artist had 10 paint brushes in his hand and then just had a seizure for 15 minutes and came up with this. I see absolutely no thought or pattern or anything put into this painting. There’s nothing to look at and I see no definition of abstract art strong enough to put this into that category. Regardless, it was put in that category, and currently holds the record for highest sold painting of all time. Also in 2006, this shit was sold for 140 million dollars. If someone can please explain these paintings to me, I’d be more than happy to hear an explanation.
This blog was not meant to be a knock on art or artists, but just to show that to a normal person such as myself, the best art ever makes absolutely zero sense.
It has been confirmed, I along with Bogdan I believe, am going to attempt the gallon challenge again. The plan is to try it tomorrow during the episode of Jersey Shore. I was embarrassed last time and got dead last. I feel the need to redeem myself and try again. I knew after 2 cups last time that I was screwed. That will not happen again. I’m going to attack the gallon with a different game plan this time. If worst comes to worst and I fail miserably again hopefully we get a decent video out of it like last time. I’ll be sure to post the video, if you haven’t seen the one from my first try, here it is (my vomit comes at 3:30). I’ve heard plenty of positive reviews.
Also, I said a week or two ago that I would monitor my food intake and try and estimate how many calories I eat daily. Well I didn’t do it quite as accurately as I would have liked but I’ve come to the general consensus that it’s between 3000 and 3500 a day. Just for a reference, a gallon of whole milk is roughly 2400 calories.
I got a real haircut today for the first time in a long time. Yoko and I ventured over to Great Clips in the shopping center where chicks cut your hair as opposed to men, not the norm for me. Anyway, there were only two cutters and one was about our age and the other was maybe in her 40’s. I let Yoko got with the younger girl and I took the cougar. I’m absolutely terrible at doing haircuts. I never know what to say when they ask how I’d like it cut. I don’t really know razor numbers or anything else so today I just said, “well, the last time I got it cut, I used clippers so everything was the same length. I’d like to make the sides shorter and the top shorter too but not by as much.” she asked how if I wanted it over my ears and I said no. Let the cutting begin. Normally I go to Mario’s where the place is decently crowded and the people working are mostly business. This place was virtually empty and conversation was necessary or it would have been really awkward. We talked about Ursinus and running and Rick Springfield and all this good stuff. It was actually nice to have a conversation with someone like that. I like talking to strangers and seeing how other people go about their business. For some reason, I had the really strong urge today in Wismer to start a conversation with the old lunch lady Dot. I just want to make her feel better, I’m sure she’d enjoy if someone actually took interest in her and had a conversation with her. Anyway, the conversation flowed relatively smoothly and I got out looking better than when I came in (well you be the judge). I had one really awkward moment though when it came to the currency exchange. It cost 11 dollars, I had 13 in my wallet. Well I figured I’d give her all 13 and the 2 extra would be a tip but I couldn’t think of anyway to say it. I gave her all 13 and didn’t say a word. She looked at it for a few seconds and realized what I was trying to do and eventually said thank you. I bid her farewell and was off to take on the rest of my day. Anyway, here are the pics, pre and post. Not to bad I don’t think.
After a hectic past couple of days, I finally have some breathing room. I had two tests last week, one on Wednesday and one on Thursday. I had a paper due today and also a test to take today. Well I got both of my tests back from last week, I got a 96 on my financial accounting one despite Dave’s critical grading on my homework, and an 84 on my macro test. An 84 seems bad but with the way Eric does tests, well an 84 will be a B+ A- type grade, the class average was a 76. Anyway, I had to bust out the last 4 pages of my paper last night and it was a bitch. I wrote for about 3 hours and got it done but the bibliography took me about 45 minutes to do and I still didn’t do it right. I waited until 12 this afternoon to start studying for my business stat test which was at 1:30. Looking back on it, I think I would have started studying earlier but hey, you win some you lose some. The test didn’t go that poorly I don’t think. Either way, I’m off to a pretty good start for the second semester of this year.
Running is also going well. Today was the last hard workout before outdoor conferences and it went pretty well. I’m running the 5k and the mile at conferences, 5k first and then the mile. As long as I PR and go something like 15:45 or under I’ll be happy. Realistically though, I just want to run with the competition. Obviously, Haverford has 6 or 7 guys running under 15 but assuming I’m in the slow heat, I’d imagine the winning time for the heat would be around 15:30. If I can just run with people and hang on as long as I can, I’ll run a fast time.
The weather has also been much nicer as of late. In Virginia it was almost 50 when I was there and it was lovely. When I came home, it really wasn’t too much colder. Today was a little chilly, 35 or so, but tomorrow and the rest of the week should be 50’s and I’ve even heard 60 on Friday. It’s obvious that my mood, along with everyone else I encounter, has sky rocketed. I’ll be running without a shirt and playing Frisbee in no time. This was a weak post but at this point I just want to some time to relax and enjoy myself. Get outside tomorrow people, spring is on the way.
I like to think that I know music pretty well. I know there are people out there with way more songs and know way more music than me but I consider myself above average in terms of knowledge. I’ve made it abundantly clear before on this blog that I really dislike the modern day rap and hip hop stuff, pretty much anything on 96.5. I like a lot of classic rock and a lot of modern stuff too. A lot of what I listen to is littered with guitar solos, some good, some bad. Here are some of my favorite guitar solos. I’m somewhat bias and this isn’t necessarily what I think are the best guitar solo’s, but just some that I really like.
Another Brick in the Wall Part II – Pink Floyd
I went on an extreme Pink Floyd frenzy first semester and I really like them. David Gilmour is a beast, not necessarily in how quickly he plays but just the way he makes guitar solos sound. I like pretty much every solo he plays but it came down to this solo or the one in Comfortably Numb. The Comfortably Numb one is usually considered better but I eventually decided on this one. The solo starts at 2:06
Sultans of Swing – Dire Straits
There are a couple of solo’s in this song but the one starting at 4:59 and going to the end of the song is my favorite. I don’t know exactly why but it gets me.
Layla (Acoustic) – Eric Clapton
The real version of this song by Derek and the Domino’s has arguably the greatest guitar riff ever, but the solo in the acoustic version is damn good. Clapton isn’t known for his crazy quick fingers so I think this guitar solo is him at his best. It starts at 2:56.
We Will Rock You – Queen
Brian May is good. Queen is also good. This solo is short and simply but it gets the job done in my opinion. Excuse the music video. The solo starts at 1:30
Where’d All the Time Go – Dr. Dog
Since I love Dr. Dog and want to spread them to everybody, here ya go. My favorite Dr. Dog solo, this is the song that got me into them in the first place so maybe it will do the same for some other people. The solo starts at 3:23
The Captain – Guster
Guster was the second concert I ever went to. I started listening to them in 11th or 12th grade and I really like them still. I actually listened to them on my run today (sort of what made me write this blog). Anyway, the guitar solo at the end of the song is really catchy and I like it a lot. I can’t seem to find one damn recorded version of the song on the internet but download the song illegally or something and listen to the guitar solo at the end.
*Edit – I have no idea why the videos are showing up in my blog. This is amazing. Hurray